Rabbi Roodyn

י) כִּי אָבִי וְאִמִּי עֲזָבוּנִי וַה’ יַאַסְפֵנִי

Though my father and mother have forsaken me, Hashem will gather me in.

Few leaders in Jewish history have had as difficult an upbringing as David. Rejected by his parents from the point of conception (Rashi) or adolescence (Sforno) there were serious questions regarding his legitimacy. This was compounded by the fact that when he was little, he used to prophesy (in an episode reminiscent of Yosef)  that he would become a great leader of the Jewish people.  As such he was rejected by the family, distanced from them and sent out to pasture the sheep by his father (Medrash HaGadol).

During this challenging formative upbringing, David made the most of his circumstances to develop a palpable sense of reliance on Hashem. Whilst tending to the sheep in the desert, he would serve Hashem and sing His praises through the Tehillim that he composed. It was out there in the solitude of the fields that he forged his relationship with his Creator, who he realised was providing him with all his needs (see metzudos david). At this point he asks Hashem to both protect him and guide him to an awareness of his life’s mission and how to achieve it, as will be seen in the next posuk.

The Gemara in Avoda Zara 17a recounts the famous story of Elazar ben Dordaya, a man who after having lived the most depraved existence is given a rude awakening from the most unlikely of places. His teshuva process comes to a climax when he exclaims אין הדבר תלוי אלא בי, if it is to be it’s up to me.

All too often we seek to use our circumstances as an excuse to avoid addressing our issues. We are willing to blame everyone apart from ourselves for our lack of growth. David Hamelech and Elazar ben Dordaya achieve greatness in very different ways, but both of them reach great heights through taking responsibility for themselves rather than wallowing in self pity.